Forget Madden…

With all of the hysteria surrounding the upcoming release of Madden Football 2008, we’ve managed to allow a greater, far more exciting football video game to slip between the cracks. What game could possibly combine the thrills of Madden Football with the chills and excitement of an all-out adventure game? Only one…

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That’s right, EA Sports’ mega-smash new release, NFL Commissioner 08!


Think you’ve got what it takes to play with the big boys? Step up and give it a go! Commissioner ’08 offers challenges unlike any other game.

Can YOU keep Pacman Jones out of the strip club/wrestling ring?

Can YOU suspend each member of the Bengals before time runs out?

Can YOU keep Al Davis from signing Michael Vick to a three-year contract from prison?

Forget on the field antics, the real action is behind the scenes! Battle for supremacy with angry owners, PETA protesters and rioting fans. Enforce the salary cap restrictions as New England attempts to sign the entire 2008 AFC Pro-Bowl team! Artfully garnish OJ Simpson’s pension while dodging knife attacks! Hold Joe Namath upright at next season’s Hall of Fame inductions!

The excitement of the game is just the beginning, check out these incredible screen caps of ACTUAL GAME PLAY!

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Avoid Michael Vick’s pack of wild dogs while still levying a one-year suspension!

Perhaps the most exciting feature of NFL Commissioner 08 is its online, interactive aspect. With the click of a button, NFL players will not only have their real-time scandals delivered to your desk each morning, but they can also interact with characters from other video games in your library!

The possibilities are endless as Chris Henry meets up with characters from Grand Theft Auto and Leisure Suit Larry joins the Minnesota Vikings for an evening boat ride! It’s Randy Moss fighting side by side on the mean streets of Double Dragon! It’s the Carolina Panthers’ Cheerleaders teaming up in the forgotten NES Classic, Bubble Bath Babes! It’s Tank Johnson in Bubble Bobble (still yet to figure that one out… maybe he just likes bubbles and/or bobbles)!

Why, just LOOK what happened when I left a copy of Super Mario Brothers 2 unattended, lying next to my copy of Commissioner 08!

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My daily scandal report read:

After a long night at the club, Adam “Pacman” Jones was seen leaving in the early morning hours with recurring Super Mario Brothers baddie, Birdo. Upon his exit, the two bumped in to Pacman’s on-again/off-again fling, Princess Toadstool. The situation quickly escalated, leading the bar owner to notify the local authorities. Both Jones and Birdo were arrested, Jones charged with public intoxication/disturbing the peach, Birdo with public intoxication and misdemeanor assault (after firing an egg in the general direction of the princess). A representative of Princess Toadstool offered the following comment:

Pacman and the Princess have chosen to keep this matter private, any questions may be directed to each party’s independent press liaison, but there will be no official statement from The Princess at this time.

Your mission: diffuse the situation by issuing your own statement regarding Jones’ upcoming suspension for off-the-field misconduct while minimizing backlash!

Bonus challenge: The original Pac-Man has filed a trademark infringement lawsuit from your Atari 2600!

The excitement never ends with NFL Commissioner 2008, now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve just been alerted to a situation in Oakland… oh, those Raiders, will they ever learn?

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4 Responses to “Forget Madden…”

  1. Marquis Chapman Says:

    haha. This is hilarious. They could probably make this into a real game.

  2. Zack Says:

    That’s awesome man, good job.

  3. Sportsattitude Says:

    Excellent work. It would sell out.

  4. Kevin Says:

    Best. One. Ever.

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